Saturday, May 22, 2010

KolonG Saturday Nite Gay Education, Many Straight Men Have Gay Sex

Thanks for Daniel J Denoon already inform this articles, and edited by Chang from MD Health news.

Nearly 10% of Self-Proclaimed 'Straight' Men Only Have Sex With Men
Nearly one in 10 men who say they're straight have sex only with other men, a New York City survey finds. And 70% of those straight-identified men having sex with men are married. In fact, 10% of all married men in this survey report same-sex behavior during the past year. This means safe-sex messages aimed at straight and gay men are likely missing this important subgroup, suggest Preeti Pathela, DrPH, New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene, and colleagues.
"To reduce the burden of sexually transmitted diseases and HIV infection among men who have sex with men, it is of utmost importance for [health care] providers to take a sexual history that ascertains the sex of a partner," Pathela and colleagues report. "Asking about a patient's sexual identity will not adequately assess his risk."

Straight Men Who Have Sex With Men

In 2003, Pathela's team performed telephone interviews with nearly 4,200 New York City men. They conducted the interviews in English, Spanish, Chinese, and Russian; a translation service helped with interviews in Greek, Korean, Yiddish, Polish, and Haitian Creole. In nearly every study of sexual behavior, the percentage of men who report sex with men is higher than the percentage of men who report being gay. So Pathela and colleagues first asked the men if they were bisexual, gay, or straight. Then they asked about specific sexual behaviors.

Some of the findings:

  • Straight-identified men who have sex with men report fewer sex partners than gay men.

  • Straight-identified men who have sex with men report fewer STDs in the past year than gay men.

  • Straight-identified men who have sex with men are less likely than gay men to report using a condom during their last sexual encounter.

  • Straight-identified men who have sex with men are more likely to be foreign born than gay men.

Also, a man who says he is straight but is having sex with other men is more likely to be married than a straight man who has sex with women, according to the survey. Only 54% of the men who say they're straight and have sex with women are married, compared with the 70% marriage rate among the men who say they're straight but have sex with men. Pathela and colleagues note that because they report fewer STDs and fewer sex partners than gay men, straight-identified men who have sex with men may think they are at lower risk of HIV and STDs. This isn't necessarily so.

The men with whom these straight-identified men have sex may themselves have multiple sex partners and elevated STD and HIV risk. The low rate of condom use makes the straight-identified men vulnerable. "Prevention messages should focus on the activities that pose risk -- for example, unprotected receptive anal sex -- and should not be framed to appeal solely to gay-identified men," Pathela and colleagues suggest.

PS. for BudhyBug....peace, ok?

KolonG "his nick name MARGO"

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KolonG "this ain't a love story"

Have you ever match with someone you just met? You browse in your manjam or facebook and when you met him you really feel so deferent like you ever met before in your before life –Dejavu-. Or How’s when you meet some boy, you really like him, you comfort being with him, together spend so much time and both of you guys so intimate but there’s no love feeling inside. This is not love story nor the romantic moment but only 2 soulmate matches together in one some other time, some other space of happiness. In gay life its very often happen in our time, sometime we try to figure it out if is it love or is it just intimate moment, some other situation both of us convinced that already have a boy friend each. Take some test is it love blooming or a friendship expectation?
My story was begin song long time ago when i was living in Jogja, and I'd love to tell here for you, Here’s my story..

[EmoBoy] hey I’m in jogja now, can we meet this is my number 0819312*****

[me] sure, let’s meet, mine 08172*****

Saturday night, Greenz Café Seturan, than its like wind blow we’re sms and decided the right place for meet, talk much, laugh much, and what I felt that time, happy to have a new pal, looking of his eyes like I run away thought the green grass in the middle of freeze morning and it became peace through my heart. Emo is great boy, being honest he’s totally my type, skinny and tall, nice black smooth skin, fat hair and seemed that he’s kinds and truly need just friend. I see him deeply that night, the way he talked, smile and touch my hand make me felt so comfort, seemed like never show any naughty mind in his head. -first test- I touch his back and his hair while we were talking, he looked at me back and smile, I knew firstly he felt un comfort but heart and mind of him let me to do that touch away with no regret, his eyes seemed to say it just of care as a best pal, and he also enjoy time to be touched so much fun. What make my weekend much bright when it came 2nd night of our met , Sunday, we’re in other café, Earth Café Babarsari, so much fun while we were browsing gay porno web inside the public, hehehe… that was stupid but we didn’t fucking care with others, close to midnight went to my room and we’ve got plenty of time to chat. –second test- holding him from behind, and his response still same, smile and said how comfort he got that hold said “nice, bro..” it came midnight when I bring him back I felt like I wont lose him, I want some more time being together, gonna miss him badly, -last test- sms him that I miss him and wish we can more further than just a friend, he replied to thank an wish we can be a best friend, just a best friend. Bingo…!!! Congratulation….!!! He past the test and it make me sure that this is what I’m looking for, pure friend with no benefits, and kinds. Together with him again is all what I want, and there will be no more dirty mind inside. Friendship is everything, best friend is the best gift that we deserve to get in this entire world, and some time we already got even we never realize..

Ps. For my EmoBoy, Thanks for the best weekend, bro. keep in touch ok? I’m gonna miss you… ;(

KolonG "how to tell him you love him"

I just walk at Legian Street here in Bali, and suddenly I saw some boy, damn...he remind me about someone in Jakarta, and a story begin to crush in my head,,

thought Jakarta, that big city full of love, desire and lust, i love Jakarta. i love this wild life and full of combat.

It has been long time i found him in chat and i did crush on him much, i called him "MonCher". we met and all started there, but my lips seemed locked up and have no idea to tell him i love him. he seemed nice, but me? never had confidence to said.. i still remember that nite when we're very first time met, i was frozzen infront of the light bright upon my vision, i thought he's not human, he's angel, perfect of eyes and smile, bright smooth skin of moon, and when i heard his voice, i even forgot how to spell any words but LOVE. he brought me to the "heaven" club, i did feel care inside, i felt that flame, so up and burned my heart, i was in love with him, but dont know he like me or he like me not, all i've had thinking is wanna be close with him, hold his heart and kiss him like i never let him go away from air i breath, than i zaps myself that my heart just flew with one side love of fair. it wasn't big mistake to love him even he never did back. but story with him was unforgatable memories. i even lost in space for long time wondering he come and love me back, just my imagination but i never hurted. love him is a gift and knowing he never love me back is a bless, hover i'm happy ever had that chance.
now life has change, and i do still love him, but i'm happy to see him happy, here the article i may share if you were me that time, and has no idea to tell him that you love him.. than you'll never feel what i felt that time ;)

Telling him "I love you" is an important step in building intimacy in arelationship step. It's three words that weigh a lot and says a lot about your commitment propose to him. Therefore you should be absolutely positive, you love him before you smash that sentence and also be prepared for all possible responses.

1.
Step 1, Think about when and where you want to tell him. Is there a special place you want to be? A certain day? For example, you might want to tell him at the restaurant where you ask him go out, this one good way to show him you have nice taste togather.
2.
Step 2, Set the mood and be romantic. Buy him a little romantic gift or something that sets a romantic tone. not to expensive but this thing make him built romantic way to remember you, and you're the best man easy to make him happy.
3.
Step 3, Look at him directly, take his hand and tell him how positive you feel about him. Give him examples of things about him you really like. Be sincere. no more drama queen act, it will make you look so player infront of him.
4.
Step 4, Tell him how you feel if you can share love and happiness with him, and how much you enjoy time together in fortune. Be specific about what you value and appreciate about being with him next, make some offering what he want and what you can give to him, flatter him up to the sky.
5.
Step 5, Follow these positive statements with telling him you love him in whatever way feels best for you. For example: "I feel I've come to love you," "I realize I love you," "I dont know bout love and how to make you happy but I feel so much love for you," "I've fallen in love with you," or simply, "I love you."
6. Step 6, if you're fail and he deny you, keep on smiling and continue your romantic sense, your nice face maybe the best way to change his idea to give you more chance if he can't accept you that time, keep in mind love is ain't easy to get but believe that always miracle after you face your bad momment. keep make him believe you love him

well...thats my simple way and hope it can be usefull for your step to tell him you love him, prepare all and pick your love now ;)

ps. dear Henz Lim, thanks for the nice short story you've gave, being with you teach me how to love patiently... miss you, "MonCher" ;)